@wolfpupy: ever since i put all my eggs in one basket i have received unsolicited egg advice, you dont know my life, you dont know what im all about
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@Jarhead44: I hate when I wake up in a strange house, & have to go outside to look at a license plate to figure out what state I'm in.
@soanim8ed: Why do prescription pills always say "by mouth?" Where else would people put th... Ooooooh.
@AsYouNotWish: I hate it when celebrities ask me to donate to some fund, you make 30 millions a movie & I make $30 a day. You send money.
@mattZillaaaa: Poured Tresemmé on a spider in the shower & scooted him down the drain, he reemerged w/ voluminous hair & screamed at me in a French accent