@Maui_Speaks: Ever wonder if you killed that one really important brain cell?
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@Biraahwa: Friend: Do you have a bird problem? Me: No. Friend: Why is there a scare crow in your compound. Me: Oh that? That's for people.
@CarolinaSong: That awkward moment when you text a pretty girl, "my shirt smells like you" & you misspell shirt
@RoosterMustache: [with my pet bird at the park] Hot girl: omg ur duck is so cute Me: *covering mr quackers ears* he's a mallard u idiot get away from me