@lwhit_the_boss: Every grocery store has free samples if you're quick enough
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@markydoodoo: Ever try spreading really cold butter on toast? I'm like the human version of that.
@PaperWash: Cop: anything in your pockets that might hurt me? "Nah" *cop pulls out a pic of his ex GF and suspect* Cop: *wiping tears* I'm over it
@MichaelAlliman: Cat 1: Are the humans asleep? Cat 2: It appears so. Cat 1: I shall now sing the anthem of my people.
@AGStr8upNinja: How to be a Canadian: 1) Love hockey 2) Use good manners 3) Drink Tim Hortons 4) Live in a igloo 5) Hunt moose with stick