@joelebean: Every guy feels macho in his car. Until he races a woman who's late for something.
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@meganamram: I never give homeless people drugs because I know they're just going to trade them for food
@juliabailz: shiny bag: THESE CHIPS ARE UNHEALTHY matte bag: THESE CHIPS ARE FROM A FARM AND GOD LOVES THEM
@causticbob: My computer crashed and now all the other computers have slowed down so they can see what's happening.
@JohnLyonTweets: Don't regret past mistakes. All of your decisions, good and bad, led you to where you are today. Disregard this if you are in prison.