@HollyMemphis: Every motorcycle cop is a liquid terminator until proven otherwise.
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@lovemyboots111: Are you guys sure common sense can't be beaten into people ? Because I'd like to give it try!
@997omar: Whenever I meet a new baby, I stand still and let it come up to me and smell my hand first before I try to pet it
@drwgmawr: Sneezed while doing sign language and accidentally threw up a gang sign. 17 drug lords are chasing me down the street. Send help.
@jake_likes_naps: Her: are you single? [flashback to 2011 where I tried to kiss a girl but she turned away and I kissed her cheek] Me: haha idk