@iscoff: Every time a bell rings an angel gets its wings. It's always the same angel. It's covered in wings now and wants to die but can't
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@HatfieldAnne: Accidentally got melted butter on some fried chicken and this is my delicious origin story.
@chanelpuke: Ppl who make fun of outfit repeating? I look bomb af so I'm gonna wear this again I'll even wear it to your funeral if you keep talking shit
@WheelTod: Tonight playing poker with a buddy he said "Care to make this interesting?" And I said "Sure. For years I've been secretly in love with you"
@Xoolun: Cops: Jay X? Me: Yes. Cops: Your dog has been reported to have chased someone on a bike. Me: Thats bullshit my dog doesnt have a bike.