@kelkulus: Every time God closes a door, he opens a window, thereby wasting electricity on air conditioning, causing climate change and dooming us all.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@OhMyBlondie: If you have your Twitter account linked to Facebook I don't think you understand what it is we do here.
@whostrevors: A moment of silence for the fat friend in a group of girls who can't jump high enough to be in the "mid air" beach picture :(
@ariscott: For someone so concerned with marriage licenses, God sure was focused on dinosaurs for 180 million years.