@mrtimlong: Every time I raise my arm a little, a falcon lands on it. It was super-cool at first, but now I'm starting to get annoyed.
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@amazymay72x: Weed doesn't give me an attitude when I forget to pay the electric bill... I love you, weed.
@AristotlesNZ: Drug commercial just listed "death" as a possible side affect. Seems totally legit. Ask your doctor if possible death is right for you..
@markydoodoo: Ever say hi to someone and immediately regret it because now you know you have to say hi to them forever?