@WilliamAder: Every time someone with a clown avi follows me I add another night light.
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@JohnLyonTweets: Interviewer: [looking through file] Are you still disruptive at nap time? Me: Wow, they weren't kidding about that permanent record thing.
@Rschooley: How dare Beyonce bring symbols of past racial strife into popular music performance!!
@Cheeseboy22: "And then we'll have the throat hole open up and a rectangle candy will drop from it. Kids will love it." ~ Inventors of Pez dispensers.
@mattytalks: Actually Jennifer, diamonds are a girls best friend, so technically I slept with your second best friend