@TheTweetOfGod: Every time you sing "What a Friend We Have in Jesus" I'm reminded how much I disapprove of My son's friends.
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@JasonLastname: Whoever invented popcorn deserves the Medal of Honor for not panicking after the first 45 seconds.
@Schmoodles: There's a party in my pants, with an all you can eat buffet, and a VIP entrance in the rear.
@ericsshadow: My fashion sense has been described as "They probably won't let you in like that" and "Are those your pajamas?"