@david8hughes: Everybody mad at me like it's common knowledge to wait til after the eulogy before you start clapping. Sorry I didn't go to funeral college.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@TomZohar: Love spending a relaxing Sunday curled up with a good book as it sits next to me untouched while I scroll through twitter for three hours
@Vodkantots: I bet if that Malaysian plane had stolen tweets, some of you guys would've found it already.
@ThaJawn: Me: *trying to be cool* Scotch Bartender: Preference? Me: *nervously* hop Bartender: Bout time! *breaks out sidewalk chalk*