@shutupmikeginn: Everyday I walk to work by a Ferrari dealership, put my nose against the etched glass window and say, "someday I'll own a window this nice."
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@rachelle_mandik: the year is 2042. a man is fired for doing "the robot" in a mixed crowd of humans and androids at the company xmas party.
@WildeThingy: Ultracrepidarianism is the habit of giving opinions & advice on matters outside one's knowledge or competence. Or, as I call it, tweeting.
@trojansauce: DATE: how about we move this to the bedroom? ME: give me one minute *i kiss all my beanie babies on the head and put them on the ground*