@weinerdog4life: Everyone at the office is going crazy because I faxed someone a hot dog
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@Busocco: I combined two hit games and made "Angry Words With Friends" where I just scream obsenities at people while throwing dead birds at them.
@SirEviscerate: Your date leans in and whispers "I'm not wearing panties." You shiver. She continues: "I pooped a little and had to throw them away."
@iwearaonesie: wife: YOU changed the sheets?! [flashback to me eating nachos in bed after she told me not to and getting cheese everywhere] me: Surprise!