@Jason_maybe: Everyone has that psycho ex we pray we'll never run into again. If you don't you're probably it.
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@Darlainky: I once brought great shame to my children by telling the drive-thru attendant I'd take as many ketchup packets as he could give me.
@HotSnuff: Guy told me I have "Bambi eyes"...is that even a compliment? Oh god, please don't shoot my mother.
@TragicAllyHere: Please. Do not push me into the pool. The pockets of my cargo shorts are filled with packets of Kraft Mac & Cheese powder.
@vornietom: People who say "don't hate the player hate the game" are working under the wildly false assumption that I am unable to hate 2 things at once