@Jason_maybe: Everyone has that psycho ex we pray we'll never run into again. If you don't you're probably it.
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@EJGomez: [speed dating] *girl sits down* "hi im melan- QUICK A ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE HAPPENS WHAT WEAPON DO YOU USE "wha- CORRECT ANSWER WAS KATANA. NEXT
@girl_a_whirl: I like how this car asks me if it's safe to move in reverse. WHERE WERE YOU WHEN I WAS GETTING MARRIED???
@TheMichaelRock: I've seen enough episodes of "Cops" to know that you should avoid all people with blurry faces.
@KKAlThani: If you set someone free, love them. Wait I mean, if you love someone for free, set them. That doesn't make sense. Forget it.