@SaveItForFest: Everyone hates their job until someone brings cupcakes in.
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@Perfect_Beanis: in 2001 i was in a coma dying from meningitis and someone played "in the end" by linkin park and i woke up to tell them to turn it off
@jonnysun: *being wrestled away from mall santa by security* u hav TWO WEEKS until deadline and ur out here doing PHOTO OPS?! WHOS DOINGE THE REAL WORK
@SaraMansford: If a guy tells you he makes 6 figures a year it doesn't necessarily mean he's rich. He could be a really lazy guy working at a toy factory.
@StockSwaff: Girls like guys who take charge: ask her out, plan a date, take a hostage, overthrow a government, nuke her ex's hometown, buy her a puppy.