@electrolemon: everyone i ever dated is impressed when i namedrop foreign authors but never bothers to check if they're just ikea product names (they are)
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@Ohgoddessitsme: I just accidentally opened the door for a jehovah's Witness and he took one look at me and just walked away.
@TheIronSherk: If pigs could fly it would make this pig catapult that I just built completely obsolete.
@thatdutchperson: Me: yeah, I'm not going to make it in today. Boss:of course, this snow is crazy. Me: Snow?