@electrolemon: everyone i ever dated is impressed when i namedrop foreign authors but never bothers to check if they're just ikea product names (they are)
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@ilovepie84: "I don't think Gay Guys should be able to get abortions" -Me when someone asks me a question that I don't know the answer to.
@Juicedballs: When Granpa revealed an exit wound scar from WWII it gave me strength to show him the owie owie bruise I suffered closing a faulty pizza box
@WilliamAder: I got free pancakes on International Pancake Day. International Women's Day is now almost over and I think I like pancake day better.