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@sbellelauren: "EVERYONE IS ENGAGED BUT YOU" - facebook
@faizziy: I save a lot of money on all my tooth extractions by engaging in street fights..
@jctwritesstuff: Just realized that my spirit animal is Winnie the Pooh.
Two words: No pants.
@thejessbess: Hey Guinevere *knight flips up his visor* Hast thou considered my proposal? Because *unsheathes blade* I'm sword of a big deal.
@CaniacMONK: When I was a kid, I wanted to be an adult.
So yeah....kids are stupid.
@Sickayduh: Dealer: You followed?
Geologist: No man. Its cool.
*dealer opens trenchcoat and metamorphic rocks fall out
Geologist: Gneiss... Gneiss