@TravLeBlanc: Everyone is just looking for that special someone who could do way better but chooses not to for some inexplicable reason.
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@jordan_stratton: Pretty sure California's water crisis could have been solved with the number of dropped ice cubes that I've lazily kicked under the fridge.
@myles_morrison: Any girl who says she's not the jealous type will change her tune when another girl phones you drunk at 3am.
@amyisforawesome: If you laid out all of the people in the world who were ever mean to me, I could then drive my car over them.