@ATXBOSS: Everyone suffering from diseases and natural disasters: hang in there, we're liking Facebook posts as fast as we can
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@mexinonblonde: I aged about 2 years and counted 14,364 cat hairs on my cashiers blouse at Walmart waiting for her to ring up my groceries.
@BromanConsul: My brother goes to "Peninsula High." When the class of 2015 got senior shirts made, no one decided to regulate them.
@PaperWash: [Freddy Krueger enters my dream but I'm blasting Rebecca Black on repeat] Who's nightmare is it now Freddy?!
@I_Bl33d_Purple: If my memory serves me, the last time I was someone's type, I was donating blood.