@ObscureGent: Everyone wants to be a Viking until you set them out to sea on a boat that's on fire.
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@SamGrittner: Saw a guy with three lip-ring piercings on the subway today. Took everything in my power not to attach a shower curtain.
@OfficeofSteve: I always leave my vehicles gas on empty because I want thiefs to be as pissed off as my wife
@daemonic3: "I'm a skeleton!" *kisses and hugs you* Stop that! *kisses and hugs you again* What kind of skeleton are you?!? "An XO skeleton"
@Staggfilms: Life is short. Take risks. Run with scissors. Dance with scissors like nobody’s watching. Stop waiting for tomorrow to do cool shit with scissors.