@GregHenchman: "Everything else tastes like us. Why do we need to die?" -chickens
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@justinshanes: Amazon thinks my recent humidifier purchase was merely the inaugural move in a newfound hobby of humidifier collecting.
@cbdoubleu: Not to brag, but I have the high score on 7 different blood pressure machines around the city. *enters initials
@lilnatebigworld: "Wow, that milk is spoiled!" *milk drives by in a fancy car his parents bought him*