@darrinfb: Excuse me while I go slip into something more alcohol.
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@Jessdaisy: I'm "the cord popped out of the phone cause I tried to stretch it from the kitchen to my room" years old
@Writepop: In the new Star Wars film, Han Solo goes to Chewbacca's home planet and discovers that all the other Wookies wear pants.
@bourgeoisalien: I like this time of year because I can dig graves in my front yard and people think it's just a cute Halloween display