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@darrinfb: Excuse me while I go slip into something more alcohol.
@AlanHungover: *Food hits floor* Little germs: GET IT!!! King Germ: NO! We must wait 5 seconds!
@Freudianscript: I wish I were a celebrity so I could be wearing a person instead of a suit.
@VodkaShorebird: Just think, there is coming an entire generation of idiots who will wonder: "Why did they have a hashtag button on landline phones?"
@noog: The year is 2200. All fossil fuels are depleted. Our only source for coal is Santa Claus. Everyone must be naughty for the sake of mankind.
@Zombieionism: Cannibals are so full of themselves and other people