@Ideal_Victoria: *experiences all five stages of grief while the waiter walks by my table with what I thought was my dinner*
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@MrAdamBez: *gets sentenced to 25 years in prison* *opens twitter app* *looks up* *being released*
@ShutUpThatsWho: *job interview* Why do you want to be a psychiatrist? *pictures clients acting like chickens after I click my fingers* I want to help people
@ThinkingSavage: Loan officer: And what is the purpose of your loan, Sir? Me: Whole Foods. I shop at Whole Foods.
@baeblacksheep: Trojan condoms were named after a city that was maliciously and deceitfully entered and then burned to the ground? Hmmm....