@adamzopf: Explain to me the down side of being under house arrest.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@iliezabeth: ME: can u pick me up in ur claws DRAGON: go AWAY dammit ME: can u just put me in ur mouth pls—I wanna look out from ur teeth like im in jail
@joejwest: SECURITY GUARD: [speaking into the cuff of his shirt] The president is on his way to the car LITTLE MOUSE THAT LIVES IN HIS SLEEVE: Ok cool
@TedBundybitch: 14: what could happen? Me: you could get her pregnant. 14: im not comfortable putting my dingaling in her thingaling Me:*writes suicide note
@CroweJam: Snooki, but without the orange tan and poofy hair. And she's in charge of North Korea.