@jonnysun: whenever i watch the tv show Friends, i imagine im the seventh friend, Dirk, who just stays home while all his friends do stuff without him

@VerifiedJayy: Maybe the Mayans were talking about hockey

@just1fool: I don't know if I should go after that ghost or not. ~Drunk Pac-Man

@longwall26: One time dad asked what my five-year plan was, and I said "death or becoming a pirate king" and he threw my cat Alan at me

@Scorpio1080: The Human Body Is 90% Water, So Basically We're Just Cucumbers With Anxiety" - Science Person