@jwoodham: FACEBOOK: Hey, remember me? I'm a girl you met in college, in that one class. We never really talked. Anyway, here's 97 pictures of my baby.
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@biscuitahoy: When you look at Twitter's trending topics, it's a lot easier to understand why they have to write "Do Not Eat" on silica gel packets.
@OkieGirl405: My favorite people are the ones that like to pass judgement on others because they have obviously lead a perfect life
@chuuew: ME: You're a silly sausage aren't you? SAUSAGE: [peering over spectacles] I may have acted out in my youth but that's not what defines me.