@UnFitz: Fact: A childless person coined the phrase "Sleep like a baby."
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@dubstep4dads: i bet the first guy to say "smooth as a babies bottom" wasnt the most respected man in the community
@Chumpstring: [Death Row] GUARD: last requests? INMATE: a little heroin would be nice TINKER BELL: *chloroforms guard* INMATE: I meant the drug stupid
@Underchilde: My parents are in town and said they’d be at my house in ten minutes, and I’m wondering if that’s enough time to build a moat.
@yaboydil: Guess who I ran into today, Billy. "Who, dad?" Your dog, son. I hit your dog with the car.