@pixelatedboat: Fact: Bernie Sanders won't release his birth certificate because it proves that when he was born he was already a 74-year-old man
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@egg_dog: good prank: sneak into someone's house every night over a year and replace thier toilet with a slightly larger one until it fills tthe room
@whatmaddness: I goofily dance over to my pals. Shit. These r strangers. Just… dance past them to my actual friends. Oh no. Help I need 2 find some1 I know
@Adam_Kingsnorth: Starbucks? Yes I'd like a tepid mug of milk froth please. My name's Adam, but you can call me Aldin.