@ehdannyboy: FACT: Uma Thurman is the only person to ever have been named by someone with a mouthful of food.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Token_Geezer: *sees baby* *feels sad that my kids aren't babies anymore* *sees look of exhausted despair in baby's parents eyes* *sadness evaporates*
@carlyken: Told my coworker I want a dragon. He said I'm crazy for wanting anything that might set all my shit on fire but he's the one that's married.
@Beardson: There is a small dent on the side of this plane. It must have a... *Puts on sunglasses* "Airline fracture"