@ShoutingGoddess: 'Failed to send tweet,' is Twitter's polite way of saying, 'Dude..'
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@williamsonnier: customer: *looking at menu* what's good? me: not much what's good with you? him: ... him: ... me: chicken salad. the chicken salad is good.
@TheToddWilliams: "Nothing is certain, except death and taxis." Don't you mean "ta-- *gets run over by a cab*