@ShoutingGoddess: 'Failed to send tweet,' is Twitter's polite way of saying, 'Dude..'
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@CornOnTheGoblin: my cornflakes bring all the boys to my yard & theyre like this cereals hard damn right my cereals hard u should add milk so its not so sharp
@secondofhername: Jurassic World: A generically modified smart 50 ft monster has turned violent and this, for some reason, took people by surprise.
@KatieBurnett: Never seen anyone in Nandos or McDonald's pick up an appropriate amount of napkins - you're cleaning up after a burger not a double homicide
@AdamBroud: [Garden of Eden] EVE: If I eat the apple I get to leave? GOD: Get to? ADAM SANDLER: Eatin that appley bappodoodaly EVE: Yes, get to.