@CornOnTheGoblin: [fake yawns to put my arm around date but it's so i can pet her dog who is also on the couch]
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@Mothpete: I'd like to thank my skeletal system for all the support its given me over the years.
@CheryeDavis: I always take the high road, because the colors are more psychedelic and sometimes you see a unicorn.
@QuietPsycho: Absinthe For when you'd love to wake up in the morning...naked on a raft in your neighbour's pool, but lack the motivation
@SteveSuckington: "You can have sex with my sister over my dead body" "Umm, I appreciate the weird offer, but I'm just gonna do it in my car"