@BBQJones28: Family cookouts are spent telling me to "stop...don't say that"
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@WheelTod: Remember kids -- it may be illegal to text and drive; but you can still lawfully handwrite someone a heartfelt letter at 50mph.
@SirEvisiae: *pretends to throw ball* *dog runs to chase it* Ha, stupid dog. *dog keeps running, disappears over horizon* Um *dog tackles me from behind*
@bobbiejo448: Dora could get to her destination in half the time if Swiper were in prison where he belongs.
@KendellMadden: "I know, right?!!" Is the WRONG thing to say when my neighbor tells me that his wife is wild in bed. Lesson learned.