@Puncroaker: Father, pardon, excuse, exonerate, absolve, acquit, forgive me, for I have synonymed.
BOSS: We need a name that gives us a good ad slogan
MY NEMESIS GARY: Maybelline?
B: You're incredible, Gary
@OhNoSheTwitnt: 2015: This is our son, Aiden.
2016: This is our son, Lemonaiden.
@Ophoenix1: I've been watching the Crime Investigation channel all day. Murder just seems like the easiest way to solve your problems.
@JermHimselfish: Time flies when a falcon steals your wristwatch.
@Prero22: If you want to become a beatboxing champion, try zipping up a tight dress.