@HeyZeus666: Fatherhood Tip : If there's puke in your coat pocket and poop on your shoulder, you're holding the baby upside down.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@chimneyspotter: GOOD COP: Give us a name! PERP: Never! TED TALK COP: Imagine a world where every single human has- PERP: Okay I'll talk, please just stop!
@clemdytan: My girlfriend told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy...so I came back drunk.