@HeyZeus666: Fatherhood Tip : If there's puke in your coat pocket and poop on your shoulder, you're holding the baby upside down.
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@Staggfilms: STARBUCKS BARISTA: I got a latte here for *squinting* Catheter Zebra Jokes? CATHERINE ZETA-JONES: *sigh* That’s gotta be mine— CATHETER ZEBRA JOKES: Hey not so fast, lady.
@KyleMcDowell86: I don't like using the locker room at the gym cuz the guys always stare when they notice my gym bag is filled with lasagna