@SherifLSharkawy: Felix went to the moon, took 5 photos. She went to the bathroom, took 37 photos.
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@imdaintyaf: How do animals in children's books always have nicer houses than mine when they don't have jobs & all they do all day is learn life lessons?
@Cheeseboy22: My wife is always like, "You answer the door, I don't even have my bra on!" and for that reason, I have stopped wearing a bra.
@Tharin_P: I would be a bad fish. Fishermen would be like, "omg i'm so ugly" and I'd take the bait and disagree, instead of swimming away.
@BobbyBucchae: Watched Full House for not even a full minute & now I'm white with a credit score of 720