@byrdie_num_num: Few people have the balls to admit when they're wrong. Then again, few people have talking balls.
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@caperbc75: *nervously adjusts fedora in Starbucks lineup I'll have uh, um, a mediu- I mean vanti, uh, mochacachito? Patrons: HE'S A FRAUD! GET HIM!!!
@KelleysBreakRm: When I open the washing machine lid mid-cycle, I feel like I've entered a party where everybody suddenly stops dancing and stares at me.
@rudy_mustang: God: then u become a butterfly Caterpillar: wow the rest of my life as a butterfly God: yah lol the "rest" C: how long G C:how long God
@JohnFDaley: There must've been a good reason Zimmerman pulled a gun on his wife. Like, maybe she was walking down the street, minding her own business.