@wendchymes: Fight club but just dueling neighbor's aggressively leaf blowing leaves onto each other's lawns.
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@OtherDanOBrien: [Cat birthday party] *Cat opens gift from her husband* "It's...an empty box." *silence* "Oh honey, I love it!"
@Sirrruh: My friend Stephen misheard me when I invited him to this CrossFit gym. He's going to have a hell of a time running in stilettos.
@rcromwell4: Follow me on Pinterest for seasonal craft ideas and spells for summoning ancient demons.