@FunnyQuotees: Finally a use for spoilers...
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@robyn_vo: According to my cousin's diploma, he graduated from an "Institute of Fine Farts" because I just made an adjustment to it with a sharpie.
@dafloydsta: [at the gym] ME: Hey, can you spot me? GUY: Sure, which machine? ME: *gestures to vending machine* Right over there
@trevso_electric: Talking about your ex makes it sound like you're not over them. Hide their body and move on like a normal person.