@FunnyQuotees: Finally a use for spoilers...
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@AtypicalMama: H:"Where'd you get those shoes?" Me:"I've had these for years. Is that a new grill I saw?" H:"Nope just cleaned the old one" *Marriage lies
@Chicken_Hawk38: I only had one beer Cupcake Can i call you Cupcake? No?? Okay, I only had one beer Officer.
@AlexEllisdon: If I was in charge of SWAT I'd change the name to the "Special Weapons And Grenades" team just so police would have to radio in for SWAG
@AnkCoupleTO: Me: *gestures to the bellhop to take my bags to my room* Vanilla Ice: Yo man, I don't work here M: *slips him a five* VI: Right away sir