@chiggerweeds: Finally figured out that 'YOLO' is 'carpe diem' in douchebag.
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@Reba_aa: I want someone to push me up against the wall.. lean in.. and softly whisper... "I'll do your housework for you"
@theshamingofjay: Me: ugh I have to wear a tie today, adulting sucks. Grandpa: I had to fight in World War II when I was 19. Me: I guess you kind of get it.
@Reverend_Scott: Dog Mechanic: The repair is gonna take longer than expected. "Why's that?" Dog Mechanic: The clutch is worn out, also because I am a dog.