@MarkusJ: finally, the ants are going to rise up and claim their rightful place as masters of this wretched planet
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@AndyAsAdjective: [at oceanside seafood restaurant] Me: Is the fish fresh here? Waiter: Yes *from the kitchen, a fish blows me a kiss & waves seductively*
@junejuly12: Hearing them call a 25 year old hockey player a 'veteran' and a 28 year old player 'old' has done zilch for my self esteem today
@RandomManik: My school always awarded dictionaries to the spelling bee winners. Which was weird because it should actually be awarded to the losers.