@rob1792: Financial status: Googling "sell kidney"
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@KurtBusiek: I saw a tweet saying liberals should create their own Captain America. They did. In 1940.
@JaymayAllDay: 1st grade: Color inside the lines. 10th grade: Color outside the lines. Art School: Snort the lines and then go color.
@StarksWeek: "I put on pants for nothing" - my 10 yo after she got dressed and her soccer game was cancelled. Someone set up her Twitter account.