@AmishPornStar1: Financial Tip: When laundering money, always separate the bills from the coins and use the delicate cycle with a gentle detergent.
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@bidenandobama: Biden: we could call it "Real Talk With Joebama" Obama: do you even know how to make a podcast, Joe?
@sofarrsogud: Of all the things we should be thankful for at this time of year, not being a turkey is probably the main one.
@desiswaaag: HOW I DRESS FOR UNIVERSITY First day of the week: brad pitt Last day of the week: homeless druggie
@djdarrellripley: Her: I was robbed! They took EVERYTHING except some wire coat hangers and my Justin Bieber CD. Me: I wonder why they left the hangers?