@jwoodham: Find a way to dress up as "accidentally liking someone's Facebook picture from 2 years ago" and really scare people this Halloween.
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@CourageDR: I have discovered that theirs no popcorn in popcorn chicken. I guess there's no point in bothering with hash browns then.
@sucittaM: Eventually we'll all just have one app on our phones that electrocutes you when you stop looking at it.
@XplodingUnicorn: [scale says I've gained 5 pounds] Me: It's probably just what I'm wearing. Wife: You're naked. Me: Wife: Me: It's a heavy deodorant.