@The_MartiniGirl: Find someone to make you laugh everyday and if that doesn't work find alcohol like I did.
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@VaguelyFunnyDan: I'm just sick of the mixed signals, babe. One second you're changing your phone number and the next you're filing a restraining order.
@lasergirl70: Getting rid of my cleaning person sounded like a good way to save money, until it came time to do the cleaning.
@Fred_Delicious: Comic Sans walks into a bar. Barman says "sorry we don't serve your type in here"
@robesman: in 2016 if i walk in to your place and ask for the wifi password and you give me a paper with 26 letters and numbers i'm leaving