@FeelingMervis: Find someone who can make you happy, like a doctor or pharmacist....basically anyone who has access to mood-enhancing drugs.
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@iwearaonesie: wife: What would you do if 9 told you he was gay? me [looking for the remote] Ask him if he's seen the remote
@murfer28: I don't want to lock my account because I like to help my X's feel better about themselves when they check in & make sure I'm still a drunk.
@batkaren: [after lover's spat] ME: Honey. Lamb chop. Sweetie cakes. HER: You're just naming foods. ME: Pumpkin. Muffin. HER: ... ME: Zucchini bread.