@thetigersez: Finding a guy to marry who is rich enough to pay off my debt, but not so rich he wants a prenup is, like, so much harder than I anticipated.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@iGreenMonk: I always carry a mushroom with me, just in case my enemy shows up & I need something to make me bigger.
@Dschnoeb: A woman on the subway this morning said "did you know the government is closed? Is it a holiday or something?" So really, we deserve this.
@TheHyyyype: My wife always tells me not to take things personally, so I hired a guy to do it for me. He already stole a bike.