@OCDelight21: If you love something, set it free. (Does not apply to ferrets.)* *I am no longer allowed on the subway.

@FeverFlave: [inventing worcestershire ​sauce] Lea: We'll bottle pickled anchovy juice and name it unpronounceable. Perrins: That might work.

@KenJennings: Shout out to whoever invented Braille! Maybe nobody remembers your name but you came up with a pretty dope way for blind people to read

@WildeThingy: Louis Lane "there is no way broccoli is a superfood!" Broccoli *takes spectacles off* Louis Lane "My God! Look, it's a superfood!"

@Jeffwni: [job interview] Interviewer: It says here that you are a blowfish. Would you care to expand?