@BareChesty: Fingerprints are proof that God doesn't trust us
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@TheAlexNevil: If reading bedtime stories to my son has taught me anything, it's that mice lead much fuller, exciting lives than I do.
@secondofhername: Lawyer: As My Lord knows,... Judge: Don't presume I know it, counsel. Lawyer: Beg pardon. *clears throat* As My Lord ought to know...
@daemonic3: Mom, can I have another piece of pecan pie? "You mean MAY, not CAN" Ok, mom can I have another piece of pemay pie?
@moxieblogger: Dear God, Laying an egg once a month would have been preferable. Thanks for nothing. ~ All women