@TrueTorontoGirl: People who say "the future is now" don't understand how time works.

@RidiculousSheri: Nobody harasses you on the street when you walk around wearing a belt made of live cats.

@CherBear162: I can't bend my pinky without my ring finger bending as well..is this normal? Let's hear your results 'cause I know you just tried it.

@Go2Slp: How to sports: - Take a ball - Put it someplace someone else doesn't want you to put it - Congratulations you've now sportsed

@Oliviathepig907: I don’t want a sugar daddy but maybe like a sugar buddy. I just hit him up like “Hey how are you today?” and he replies “Doing great thanks for asking here’s $7,000. “