@aneesa_p: First rule of brown girl club: Don't wear pink & white striped shirts; you'll look like Neopolitan ice cream.
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@iamspacegirl: [Spelling Bee] Judge: Your word is... Grease. Me: Grease is the word? Judge: Yes. Grease is the word that you heard.
@dsmitty62: I see Paris, I see France, I got a great new pair of binoculars from an overpriced sporting goods store today
@Reverend_Scott: [landlord walks in apartment] "I told you no pets!" That's a stray gerbil. "And those fish??" ...stray fish. SHOO FISH, SCRAM